Trey Parker and Matt Stone are right.

The Cure's "Disintegration" is one of the best albums of all time.

That is all.

A Top Ten of Television Theme Songs for a 25 Year Old Elitist

10. Legends of the Hidden Temple

Everyone remembers the theme song fondly. The show not so much.




9. Doug

Doug was kind of a weiner, but the theme song takes me back to the days where Nickelodeon was the dope shit. On a sidenote, Porkchop knew what was up.


8. The Adventures of Pete and Pete

Not only did the show kick ass, the theme song was kick ass. It's weird, I never watched the show as religiously as some of the others on this list, but I was sad to see it go when it did. Remember the episode where it's daylight savings and Pete is psyched because he gets to travel back in time? You'll know what I am talking about if you've watched it, one of my favorite episodes ever.

7. Captain Planet

Even at a young age I knew I wanted to do inappropriate things with Linka. Don't judge me.

Oh, and is it just me or does Captain Planet strike you as a flaming douchebag? It has to be the mullet. Seriously, put him in a pair of jean shorts and a wife beater and you just have another backwoods asshole that lives off the land.




6. Talespin

I really shouldn't have to justify this one, any of the Disney Afternoon songs could go here, but this is the best one. Click it, you'll thank me later.



5. NBA on NBC

Remember the good old days before Marv Albert was a pervert? Neither do I, but damn, do I ever miss that theme song.





4. The Simpsons

I don't know if there is a more recognizable theme song than the Simpsons theme song. Can you name one? I am having a really tough time doing so.

3. Inspector Gadget

Tell me you don't remember Inspector Gadget, this is one of the rare classics. I don't know if anybody in my generation could fail to identify this song. Props to the creator because it was also a badass show.


2. Thundercats

Thunder, thunder, thundercats!





1. The Critic

I don't know what it is, I went into this list knowing that the Critic would be my number 1. Something about the theme and the show that was before its time and I have to think it would do so much better nowadays. The world was a better place when Jon Lovitz's voice was accessible to the masses via that pudgy little bastard, Jay Sherman.

File Under "F" For "Full of Shit".

As a liberal advocate of the basic ideals of the University of Notre Dame, there has been a recent "issue" that has been grating on my spine.

On May 17th, Barack Obama will deliver the commencement address at the University of Notre Dame. The Catholic institution is one of three schools that will have the honor of a Presidential speech this year, placing it alongside Arizona State University and the U.S. Naval Academy.

Typically, such an event would be received with open arms, as well as a chorus of "ooh's" and "aah's"; oddly, the Notre Dame alumni have responded differently. The University administration has refused to rescind the invitation and as a result has been caught squarely in the crosshair of alumni outrage.

The issue at hand here has boiled down to the pro-choice vs. pro-life debate. Obama is pro-choice. Catholics, generally speaking, are not. Notre Dame is a Catholic institution. Sounds simple, right? I'll be the first to admit that the cause of the ire, is pretty straightforward. My aim here is not to stoke the fires of that debate, not in the slightest, but initially, I was very disappointed in the University for the reaction to the news.

Then I realized that one key operative was always in tow with the protests, and that would be "alumni". The alleged controversy isn't the fault of the institution. Nor is it the fault of the student body, it should be noted that Notre Dame, as it stands today, supports Obama coming to deliver the address. The alumni refuse to acknowledge several fairly important bits of information:

1. In a mock election leading up to the real general election, the student body voted 52% in favor of Obama
2. When recently polled, 75% of the student body said they were in favor of the president delivering the speech.
3. 90%+ of graduating seniors were in favor of the P.O.T.U.S. coming to campus.

We'll leave it at those three points. Nevermind that Notre Dame is keeping with the tradition of each president, since Carter, delivering a commencement address to a graduating class. The kids who put in the four years of work to receive a degree from one of the United States' finer academic institutions are overwhelmingly in favor of him delivering the speech. The administration is also on their side. What does this all mean in the end?

Again, this isn't pro-choice vs. pro-life for me. Moreso this comes down to the alumni needing to pull their collective heads out of their asses. Commencement is not about them, plain and simple. If anything, the alumni should be proud of the University for being willing to invite the potential of an open discourse between the viewpoints of a liberal President, and that of a conservative institution. The event will do nothing but bolster the reputation of the University for being a "think tank"; one where more perspectives are invited to create a more independently minded individual.

What the alumni have to come to terms with here is simple. Obama's commencement address is not about them. It will not be about abortion. It is not a forum for them to voice the conservative gripes that the person speaking cannot see Russia from their backyard. It is a moment where the University is inviting the President, of what is still the most powerful nation on Earth, to deliver a speech to the ranks of their future representatives and newest Notre Dame family members. This is an opportunity to further extoll the virtues of a Notre Dame education.